#DailyProverbs December 20, 2011

Prov20.7 Children are fortunate if they have a father who is honest and does what is right.

Omg, how f'n true is this statement? How easy would life be if we didn't have confusing role models? If our dad's were bastions of "right" and didn't hit us, or scare us, or disappoint us?

Cheers to all the kids with good dads.

I Am The Best Boyfriend I Ever Had...

I don’t mind being single.

No, seriously. Srsly. SRSLY!!!

I don’t mind being single. I don’t even mind being asked constantly if I am single. But lately, everyone seems to want to set me up with someone (generally, I don’t like this). Or people constantly ask me if I like it versus being in a relationship. (I do.)

If I didn’t like it, I wouldn’t be (wink).

But I genuinely like and enjoy being single.

I like having people to date, and maybe even someone that is special and consistent, but the main reason I truly feel that I can survive “alone” is… Well, I am the best boyfriend I ever had. Trust me, there is a reason I am single. I have picked some crazy ass boyfriends, and I realize that the “picking and dating” are all my fault. I own that. I have taken it in, and realized that I have a pattern of dating down. That I have a pattern of dating people that need a savior, or a caretaker, or a mom… And I am more than aware of my own faults that contributed to breakups… So, no surprises there… But I do think that the main reason is just that I enjoy being single and free.

I had decided a long, long time ago after someone didn’t treat me particularly well that I would never allow myself to be devalued or underappreciated again. And I have tried to hold that pact with myself. Now, I haven’t always been successful, but I haven’t just allowed it and gone along with it. But what I can say is that I will never be in such a position again. Why? Because. I am the best for me. I know what’s best for me. I love me. I will take care of me. I will fight for me. I will fight BACK for me. I will respect me. I will cherish me. I will never give up on me.

Plus… It never hurts to have a list of awesomeness about my relationship with me:
I never fight with me.
I always let me have the remote.

I never put my cold feet on me.
I don’t argue with me over the thermostat. In fact, I love how in sync I am with me over temperature.
When I buy myself a surprise, I always love it. Generally, I am good to me.
I have never missed my birthday.
I have never missed my anniversary.
I have never stood me up.
I have never made me feel ugly.
I have never argued with me over where to eat.
I love the restaurants I pick out for me to go to.
I know my favorite color.
I know my favorite drink.
I can answer how I take my coffee.
I have never had to wait on me to get ready for a date.
I love the same movies as me.
I know that when I need a bottle of wine and a blanket to watch sad movies, just let me run with it.
I know just how to turn me on.
I know just how to get me off.
I never tell myself I have a headache.
I am hilarious. I always laugh at my jokes…
I don’t think my mom is interfering in my relationship with me.
I won’t let me get too crazy.
I love my circle of friends.
I am not jealous of me and the time I give to others.

I trust me when I have to work late.

I never send me crazy text message or call me 80 times while I am working or traveling.

All in all, I think I am pretty kick ass boyfriend. And I am a pretty good date for myself. I crack me up and I like to spend time with me. I think we are getting pretty serious. Maybe I’ll even marry me soon. Or at least pop the question and get some nice jewelry out of it for me!!

Cheers!
#JustBeingMichael

Is it still lonely, if you are alone on purpose?

Oh, and thanks, but no thanks, I don’t think I’ll need your acquaintance…

The holidays are here.

Decidely here. And I have been trying to avoid them. With fervor. I have not really been in a holiday mood or spirit at all. I am sure that you could tell. I can't quite put my finger on it, but I am just not feeling it. Luckily, Maureen’s wedding provided a much needed distraction and event during Thanksgiving, but Christmas is still looming. Closer and closer, it is stealthily creeping daily. Never stopping. And that has made me think. Think about family, about friends, and about relationships. Now, y’all… this isn’t a blog about my family…or something that has happened. This is really more of just random musings that have been in my head as of late. Well, I guess it’s about time, really. That and about priorities… and what is important in my life. Truly important.

I mean, it’s no secret that I work a lot. Of course, I wouldn’t say too much, but I do realize that I work more than your average person. I didn’t think anything of it for years, until I realized that everyone made a face or kind of recoiled. No, seriously… everyone visibly blanches or makes some type of face when I explain what I do, how much I travel and how much I work. I never understood it, and I’d be like “But, why? I like to work.” And that’s just the truth: I like to be busy. I like to always have something going on. (I have no idea where I get this gene from… My mother is not like that and requires down time. My dad is the same way. So, siblings, cousins, etc… Where did WE get it from?)

Anyway, work. Lots of it. And this, in turn, breeds people I need to see, and places I need to go. Which in turn, breeds required travel. Apparently, this requires lots of travel. Sooo, that in turn provides alone time. (I am sure there is a diagram for this. Or I’ll need to create one, but yeah…)

Part of me realizes that there is a need in me for companionship, friendships, and relationships in general. I DO need people around me. I like familiarity. I love my friends and family and I like them close and around. Generally, I have kept my work and social lives in balance. But traveling has altered and tilted that balance I had carefully cultivated and created. It has made my life where I have less control of my alone time. I am a very social creature. I am not one that likes or loves to be alone for extended periods of time. And I know that. I don’t see it as a weakness or a crutch, and more importantly… I am perfectly okay with that. But, the social aspect is that for weeks I’ll miss my Jackson friends and miss out. And then for weeks, I’ll miss out on my Tampa friends. And both will require weeks of social catch up and endless events and appointments. That can become tiring after about 2 or 3 days back in a location where you just want a fluffy robe, a couch, some wine, and a movie.

OR, then I’ll have weeks of travel and I’ll have extended amounts of time where I am in a different city and know no one. And have lots of time to myself. This is great for a day or two, because I REQUIRE some amounts of alone time. I like to focus on things… and I need time to organize, time to study, time to reflect. I need time to plan and recharge. Time to focus and make sure I am following the right path. In those lights, I intellectually understand that. But I don’t require LOTS of time like that. The benefit is that I get to be with my thoughts, but after a day or two by yourself in a hotel, you are willing to sit in a hotel bar and make friends with strangers, staff or drivers. Since I am not a dull person, I am always meeting new people, and being “Michael K”. I am always getting myself into some type of situation that usually ends up with a funny story.

I do realize how this can read, and I am not “complaining” about either situation. I love my life. I am very blessed and have no reason to bitch or moan. And truthfully, neither situation is a bad thing, per se, but I generally like to be in control of my circumstances. (I am sure those close to me are nodding heads and rolling their eyes) So, while some alone time is needed, how much is TOO much? I mean, I don’t think I feel lonely. But there are days where I do feel left out. When friends don’t invite me places because they don’t think I’ll be around to go anywhere. And it happens in both cities. I mean, I realize that people are not required to keep up with my schedule, but geez... I wouldn’t mind a text or message sometimes reminding me that you know I am alive. Or when it comes to events and invitations, as a result, I am either invited last minute, or not at all… To be perfectly frank, I think it contributed to my last break up mainly because I am so independent naturally and it just promotes me being in my own head, with my own ideals and not really bonding closely with the other person.

Reflecting on some of this and on the actions of others lately, I think I am going to have to start more closely paying attention to social activities vs. quality time with real friends. And making sure that I pick the right one with the right one! (Now, don’t get your panties in a wad: If you don’t make the cut, then you are probably not going to miss me anyway.) If I never see you, never hear from you, you never respond to text, twitter or facebook… Then WHY would I put in extra work or more work than you to maintain a friendship?? Doesn’t mean I am not your acquaintance or “friend”, it just means that I got the hint. Friendships and relationships take work, and sometimes it’s apparent when you are the only one texting or calling when you are available. Now, trust me when I say that I am not one of those poor souls that simply MUST have company every second of every day. But I do enjoy a full social life. I like it. AND I like my solitude just as much. It’s my Gemini nature. So, yes… I am definitely going to have to start more closely paying attention to how I allocate my time with friends and family to ensure that I am getting "quality vs. quantity" with my time.

Oh, and Bah! Humbug! and all that...

Cheers!
#JustBeingMichael

Addendum!

Besides, I like being an informative and useful Blogger, too! #JustBeingMichael does want to do things that are consistently helpful and good.

Or maybe I am just feeling too warm and fuzzy today. But, let’s hope it sticks. I think I’ll like the me I am becoming. I'm pretty sure I will...

Hola! Hello! Hellorrr!

Hola! Hello! Hellorrr!

How are you, Gentle Readers? How’s your fall holiday season been thus far? How was your Halloween? Your Samhain? How was your Thanksgiving? Do you have big plans for Christmas and New Year’s?

I will be honest, Life has just been so... busy. I have barely had time to tweet, and update Facebook; but I have been a woefully lazy blogger. I have lost almost all of my followers. Which makes me sad, but to be honest… It was probably for the best. I am revamping. I am reformatting. I am changing the way I blog.

I have taken some great advice and looked inward. And it was just about time. I had gotten into a rut with my life. My love life, my work life, my social life, and that crept into my social media and just my... existence. However, my situation has become so, so, SO different lately and being newly single, traveling more than ever, and being busier than ever with work and projects… Well. It’s time to dust off laptop (or in reality, probably my tablet and smart phone) and really seriously blog again.

I have noticed that I tend to go through cycles. In the late 90’s and early 2K’s I blogged furiously. And then I have off and on and with the advent of advancements in social media… it’s made it even easier. But it makes it easier to not take the time to properly do it. To really think about what I am putting out there and what I want to be or represent. I miss it, for sure. But I want to track some of the things and happenings of my life. I want to make sure I capture and share it. Use if for education, inspiration, and maybe even just good ole fashioned entertainment.
In fact, I decided right here and now that I’ll be changing the name. Oh, it’s still me. Michael. Michael K. MK, and the moniker that just stuck the longest: JustBeingMichael. So, iIt’s still Jus’ Bein’ Michael. Homespun southern charm. Witty repartee and good ole “horse sense” wisdom. But, I am going back to my roots. The southern ones. The ones where I try to find the good and not just the obvious snarky, deconstructive in everything.

So, I’ll just go by JustBeingMichael now. No more Michael Chronicles. No more glorified tales of drunken youth from years ago and how we taunted others, embarrassed our mothers, drank mercilessly, or just plain acted a fool. Like it was staged, or like we didn’t have anything to live for. I won’t shy away from the funny, and obvious, but I don’t think I am going to actively search for the snark anymore. I want my life to mean more. I want to make a mark. I want to be a helpful mentor. Or just a shoulder. Maybe just someone that is funny. Or entertaining. Or even just… there. Besides, I think that a gay, spiritual, professional that travels constantly has lots to offer in funny stories alone. My life is practically a reality show sitcom.

Cheers,
#JustBeingMichael

Cast/Crew Letter for Annie

Hello Everyone,

I’d like to take a moment to share with you that Divine Inspiration has struck!

Naturally, I was taking a small nap after a pretty intense “communion” session; and I was awaked by what I can only call “The Lord”. I was given a clear vision of what to do and the folks that could make it happen. And that involves YOU!

Get ready for it: Pentecost… Annie… And then put them together. That’s right! Together!

I know, I know… I told the Lord that it was crazy, but there it was, like small bush set aflame. And it’s pretty exciting that we’ll be doing a full Pentecost version of “Annie”! I know I am WAY psyched for all of you. Now, time is scarce, and since the reunion is obviously the place to do it, I’ll be casting for the roles in Annie for those dates. We’ll do a surprise flash mob to a revamped and Godly inspirational medley of songs… Please be honored to be included. You should be.

Logistics being a necessary evil, and aware that God may not email you your own part, I’ll need to be organized. You’ll receive your labeled cassette(s) with your part played by me in an old carpeted piano room on a “slightly” tuned piano for you to learn and be ready by the deadline. These are hard deadlines and not the kind that “you thought it was due for next practice”. Obviously NMMC has taught us all who those people are. I won’t call anyone out, but I am looking directly at you, Tonisa and Wade. I will thank my company in advance that they “donated” teleconference lines and WebEx sessions for our “ministry”. We can practice via conference calls until the big day! Preferably prepared and in tune, People!!! Also, and last, but certainly not least… there WILL be a Prayer Phone Tree associated with the cast list that can be used for excused absences in an emergency. Otherwise, the PPT is just for prayer (abusers of current PPTs know who you are… DeAnna!) I have travailed and interceded for the right person to pass such a responsibility off to for this project and I feel that they have shown admirable qualities to take the reigns.

Now, BREAK A LEG!

CONGRATULATIONS! You have been selected for the 2012 Revival Production of:

“Pentecost” Annie
Or

pANNIEcost:
Hard Knocks Lives Can Be Changed and ReArranged
Through Jesus

Annie - An 11-year-old redheaded girl, optimistic and "spunky"; seeking the Holy Ghost and her lost parents. A pivotal and riveting role showcasing the vulnerability of those with the Devil’s Hair color and how sometimes, family is found through hardships, and not just because you were born.
Candi Merriman Davis; Understudy: Jeremy Smith (he can hit the notes…)

Miss Hannigan - The alcoholic orphanage matron. She is backslidden and disillusioned, she hates children, but is fond of alcoholic beverages. This is a heavy role to carry to make it believable. Miss Hannigan isn’t technically a woman of virtue, but she is a woman that doesn’t “spare the rod”. So, she does have some redeeming and Godly qualities. Just not the right ones…
Muzette Krebs; Understudy: Rhonda Fleming (she knows the part…)

Daddy Oliver Warbucks - Billionaire businessman who opens his home – and heart – to Annie. He isn’t afraid of an offering plate passing by the second or third time at a Missions Conference, nor adding a wing to a growing church. While he isn’t a demonstrative worshipper, he is definitely indicative of the old adage “Still Waters Run Deep”. He will be the first to ring out a rich and baritone, “Amen”!
David Scott

Grace Farrell - Warbucks' faithful secretary, who loves Annie from the start. She can collate sheet music with the best of them and she isn’t afraid to say no to someone stealing her pens! She won’t let her boss down, and she won’t let God down. Administration is a ministry, too!!!
Lisa Douglas Fitzwater; Understudy: Dana Mounce Bowman

Punjab – Warbuck’s faithful bodyguard. Sometimes, It just takes a miracle or two (or a turban) to get a move of God falling from the pulpit to the pew! And Punjab is a character than can call down a move of God! Glory! Whostola MyHundai Nowanna Daewoo!!!
Kevin Edwards

Rooster - Miss Hannigan's no-good brother, out for the quick buck. Every pack of disciples has a Judas, and every On Fire Revival church has a pack of deacons! In a crucial and telling role, this character is there to show us that without the rain, we might not enjoy the sun!
Brian Whipple

Lily St. Regis - Rooster's girlfriend, is smarter than she appears. Because even the devil needs a cheerleader! Rooster just needs that love and reassurance. It might even be the love of a good and Godly woman that brings him back to an altar of repentance and grace. Might…
Stacey Douglas Branham

The orphans at the orphanage, ages 6 to 13. Timid and helpless creatures. Obviously forgotten by the world and the church. These rascals are there to help Annie along in her journey, but would they lend her their Hot Sticks or Rave Number Four during Youth Camp on Cute Evangelist Night? Probably not…
Molly Tracee Clouse Bowles
Pepper DeAnna Sibley
Duffy Melody Krebs Connell
July Jennifer Ethridge
Tessie Teresa Spencer
Kate Jennifer Williams

Franklin D. Roosevelt - President of the United States, he aids Warbucks in the search for Annie's parents. Every group has a Bishop and this ensemble is no exception. Full of charisma and charm, this character is as endearing as he is mischievous. One day, with enough faith, he’ll be able to walk again as well.
Jeremiah Sibley

Louis Brandeis - Associate Justice of the U.S. Supreme Court, he is called upon to assist in Annie's adoption. This is a role that proves that God wants his people in Politics and Positions of Power! Or, if I misread the Spirit… then it proves that God can use people in politics in spite of themselves and through their corruption and ignorance.
Andrew Roemer

Bert Healy – Radio announcer who agrees to broadcast Annie's search for her parents. One might equate this crucial role to a Jeremiah or that guy from a book in the OT that broke a pot and made echoes. Even God needs a mouthpiece and someone that knows how to keep the feedback and interference out of the message. This is that guy. Break a pot and tell the story guy…
Jarrett Humprhies

The Boylan Sisters - Singers on the Bert Healy Show and hope to be famous someday. These are the girls that love to sing and love their family. The casting for this choice was obvious. There were enough Dominguii Sisters to have lead roles and understudies. God truly moves in mysterious ways. But sometimes, God moves in pretty obvious ways, too…
Sylvia Dominguez Montoya & Sarah Dominguez Murane; Understudy(s): The other two Dominguii…

Lt. Ward - A policeman sent after Annie, finds her at the Hoovervilles. So you think that Jesus came to erase the “Law” and give us complete freedom?? Not so, poor uninformed masses… He came to fulfill the Law and that is where this character comes in… The Law.
Cecelia Holley (if you could bring your bike as a police motorcycle…that’d be great.)

Sandy - An abandoned mixed–breed dog that Annie rescues, he becomes her faithful companion. Sometimes, a dog is just a dog. There is no reason.
Holly, the dog; Understudy: Andrew Roemer in a dual role if Holly is unavailable. She probably has a very busy schedule.

Musicians/Music Accompaniment
Drama Directors/Choreography – Kristin Clark Andrus, Katherine Stuckenberg
Musical Director – Michael Kennedy, David Scott
Piano - Nikki Copelin, Susan Ware Hill
Organ - David Geri, Doretha Bourn, Shaun Smith
Bass - Wade Haskins, Jarrett Humpries
Drums - Jarrett Humpries, Dale Cole
Keys/Synth - Cynthia Dominguez
Guitar/Sax - Nate Lawrence
Back up Singers or “Praise” Singers - Melanie Sullivan Rutland, Stacy Hyatt Lawrence, Tonisa Bourn, Josh Glick, Steven Andrus, Gina Yohe Hill
Prayer Warrior and PPT Activator/Administrator - Kelli Linkinhoker, Gina Yohe Hill

If you were left out…well, then think about that. Maybe you should be more open. God doesn’t always use a person based on ABILITY. He uses based on AVAIL-ABILITY…

…Or maybe you should be more talented. …Or give better tithes. …Or get the scissors untangled from your hair. Whatever the reason, in your heart and of course, Jesus, already know why, M’okay?? If you have questions or seek answers, well… Just pray about it.

Yours in Jesus,
MK

#DailyProverb Sep 7

Basically, Proverbs 7 is about staying away from slutty, enticing women. Basically... but what a huge lot to hang on girls.

Obeying this... and really delving into the literal nature of this chapter is 'No problemo' for me. I am not likely any time soon to be led astray or enticed by a girl, lady, or aduteress. I am strong. I am manly. And I am a big ole girl... But, seriously... that doesn't help me in my quest to read Proverbs every day and glean some type of wisdom from Solomon. This project is important to me. So, what does the text actually say and mean for me? My son... blah blah blah, stay away from sluts, married women, and fancy beds of whores. Mm'kay....

Now, granted, in today's society, that's kind of misogynistic to assume that the woman is who leads men astray and that the man plays no part in being "enticed". I could insert a joke here. One about how true this is. A joke that men are generally thinking with the wrong head. (they are...) Or a joke du jour about how they (we...) are all like boys or children that ARE easily led astray. And those jokes would be true. Sadly, sadly true. Even the most tried-and-true-blue-blooded-good-as-gold-guy will be, at a minimum, visually stimulated. At. A. Minimum. And the flip side of this coin... the other side of the joke is that he will be enticed and lured and stimulated by gorgeous, but skanky woman in a push up water bra asking for another round.

Don't believe me? Hit the 'Bulldog' on a Friday or Saturday nite... Everyone is out doing eeveryone else. The girls are dressed to impress and the guys are strutting around like peacocks vying for the attention. It is really something. Everyone is out for a reason... And it isn't for the cuisine of a chain restaurant... But, there is more, however; Much, much more to all of this. The game. The chase. The wanting... I think this is just an old fashioned way, or parabillic way of presenting information. I think the "she" here is proverbial. Like a boat, or a car...

And for the next section, I think that just might be apporpriate: The "She" is someting you want. Something that you want to have. Something you want to want you. Something you want to be yours. Sarcastic Newsflash: Men are competitive. Men are aggressive, competitive, and possessive. We like to conquer and then own. We are childish, and don't like to share. We don't care for CO-anything. There is one boss. One leader. One... To quote "The Highlander"... There can be only one!

I don't always understand the nature of man. I dont understand the need for One... but I have to admit: As the writer, I have it. I am that way. There is a core drive inside me to win. To be the best and to conquer. That leaves me vulnerable to be enticed...

By "her"... "She"... "She" can entice you beyond your comfort, and eventually hurt you. "She" can make you want things that you never wanted. Need things. Need them in a way that doesn't make sense or let you sleep. "She" can make you work a second job and leave spending time with your family just to have "her". "She" can make you steal. "She" can make you lie to your family. To your friends. To your lover. To your boss. To yourself.

Good lord, who the hell is this bitch? I am reading back what I wrote and she sounds either super powerful and awesome... Or she sounds manipulative and awful. And the fact is: "She's" both... That is just the truth. Like you and me, "she" has both good and bad. That is a truth we can all relate to. The "she" of the American Dream. The "she" of keeping up with the Joneses or Smiths or... Kennedys. It's that "she" that makes you spend an extra 20K on a house mortgage you shouldn't. "She" makes you trade your car in to impress your neighbors, and family. When you are loved as is, your old car ran fine, and you are worried that you cannot afford a new car. Maybe "she" makes you pull out a credit card for a frivolous purchase during a recession and damn near depression in our economy.

Clearly, the underlying message here is an overarching one in the chapter: Beware of things that seem too good to be true.

Beware a deal, a job, a car, a mate, a home, or anything that makes you compromise too much. Beware. Think some of these things through? Is a new experience with a lover worth losing the respect of a partner? Is the rush of owning a new object worth the stress of overtime and paying late credit card fees? Is the joy of enjoying lavish food worth the next day's shame and next year' waistline? Can you justify the money spent on "good times" and wine and frivolity, when your car needs a taillight and you need a new computer? Is drinking that third, fourth, and fifth drink worth the stress on your partner, and the disappointment felt by everyone later?

All of this is something I definitely need to be on a continuous look out for in my life. People offer fun, fame, and good times. But at what cost? People offer love, friendship, and adoration.... but at what cost? What is "she" costing me? What is the cost sometimes of being MichaelK? I think that might be, or should be, one of my next blog series. To do the analysis and analytics of what I spend to be me. And what could I spend to be just as happy and healthy and settled? Not just the money... although, believe me honey... it takes a village. But, seriously, what does it really cost me in myself, in my wallet, in my integrity, in my heart? In my relationships? What is it that I give up to have my job, money, lover, house, friends, and life???

What does "she" cost you? What does your life cost you?